[PETER WROTE] By now, Jbird had lost interest in his "magic" stick, which was, in actuality, a piece of hardened wood filler that had been peeled away from the side door, and which Jbird had just dropped into the dog's excrement. He shook his head as it occurred to him that he had forgotten to ask Puffy the Claw about the health benefits of raw Orangutan. These types of jabs were not above Chelsea's head. Indeed, like many of the great apes, what Chelsea feared most was public humiliation, and even the most innocent and seemingly innocuous of slants could send her into a violent rampage. Both Mr. Puffington and Chelsea were sensitive creatures. The difference, however, was that Chelsea had only a crude appreciation for sarcasm, which made her suspicious of people like Jbird, who were always speaking with double meaning. That's why she looked so flustered when Thurston asked her -- and with a straight face, no doubt -- how fortified wine effected the evolution of the female orangutan's digestive system.